Poor but still proud

According to Oxfam, just under one-in-four people in the UK live in poverty including one-in-three children — four million of them. But even though that is a high figure for such a ‘rich’ country, poor families are faced with daily discrimination.

Oxfam is famed for bringing the plight of those living in poverty in Third World countries to our attention, so when many people think of poverty they think of starving people in Africa.

Even those in the UK who are actually living in poverty may not even recognise that they are. After all, they have a roof over their head, food in the cupboard, heating and electricity. Yet within the UK relative poverty is as real as the absolute poverty of Third World countries. The flooding of New Orleans in 2005 showed the world that even the richest nation in the world had a large number of people living in poverty but still discrimination against these people goes on.

Families living in poverty are poor in many more ways — they lack status, they may lack friends, lack a social life, lack support networks, lack confidence, and lack dignity. In many communities there is a lack of ‘community spirit’: people don’t know their neighbours, they may not live near their families, and because they can’t afford a social life they are less likely to be able to make friends and build up support networks. The friends they do have are more than likely to be in the same boat.

Lack of confidence can mean that it is harder to access those services that are available to families. Services such as Surestart and parent and toddler groups are often well advertised but it can be hard to walk into a room full of strangers who may have already made friends with each other.

The benefits system in the UK is recognised worldwide but yet what isn’t so recognised is the benefit trap: once people are on benefits it can be very hard to get off them and into a decent paid job, and almost 50% of those children classed as living in poverty come from a family where one parent is working.

The government’s various initiatives to get people off benefits and back into work are common sense — a good idea in theory —however, it is forcing many parents into low paid work with many worse off than they were on benefits; when families feel they have no choice but to ask for help they are often made to feel at fault.

Families are told, more often than not, what they need, rather then being asked what they need. If families challenge the decisions made regarding which services they need, a ‘beggars can’t be choosers’ attitude is often evident.

Poverty is not always self-inflicted. Family break-downs, domestic violence, illness, redundancy, and those leaving ‘care’ are just a few examples of how families find themselves in poverty.

The everyday struggle to survive on the benefits families receive, which do not rise in line with the rise in earnings, is further made difficult by the negative media attention focused on those claiming benefits.

Families are often seen as scroungers, lazy, criminals, or the latest label ‘Chavs’. Media and society do not seem to recognise the resilience, the skill, and the determination that these families have to demonstrate in order to provide the best they can for themselves on a small amount of money. Yes, some do turn to crime — not necessarily through greed but through desperation to survive.

Probably one of the biggest crimes committed by those on benefits is cash-in-hand work; not so they can buy the latest plasma TV, games console, or trainers but to be able to afford the children’s uniform, to clothe their children adequately, to put adequate food on the table, or just to pay for the huge increase in fuel costs.

These are just some examples. I am not condoning this type of crime, just asking for people to understand that the media is not always accurate when labelling all families as a result of the actions of a few.

Approximately 98% of families who are in contact with social services are classed as living in poverty yet social workers barely cover poverty in their training. Therefore social workers and many professionals are ignorant to the effects of relative poverty within the UK, often coming to the conclusion that families are living in self-inflicted poverty.

This is far from the reality of why families find themselves in this position. Family breakdown, illness, disability, domestic abuse, people leaving local authority care, and caring for a relative are just some of the reasons that families end up in the benefits system. They do not all have a drug or alcohol problem, but those that do need to be understood and helped as these usually mask problems from which they are trying to escape.

Living in poverty affects people’s mental health. Many parents will suffer from depression, some more severe then others; many fear seeking help as they fear losing their children as they may be viewed as inadequate.

Although social services and other professionals do have a duty to protect children from harm or neglect, who protects the parents from harm or neglect brought on by the effects of poverty? Families who do admit to struggling mentally due to financial pressures are frowned upon and told, ‘well get a job’, but it is not always as simple as walking into the job centre and getting one.

If you are struggling to survive on a day- to-day basis and have been told by society that you are worthless and inadequate, how will you find the confidence to go out there and sell yourself to potential employers?

Yes, there have been vast improvements in getting people back into work, especially financially, but what about keeping them in work? They may lose pay if they need to take time off work to look after a sick child, and school holidays means possibly paying out more money for childcare: although up to 70% of the cost of childcare is paid with childcare vouchers, finding the other 30% can be a struggle if parents are in low paid or part-time work.

On top of this paying household bills, rent, council tax, travel expenses, and other essential costs can mean that many families are genuinely better off on benefits than they are in work.

The pressure within families living in poverty can be extreme; parents pressured by children for the latest trainers, computer games, or just money to go out, and partners quarrelling over how the household income is spent means that some families are like pressure cookers. We live in a materialistic society and it is hard not to feel left out when you cannot afford these things.

Some of the generations before us have the view that if you don’t have the cash then you should go without but I am sure that those generations were not bombarded on a daily basis with offers of credit cards, loans, and catalogues. These more often than not are too tempting to turn down, especially if a household essential like the fridge has broken down and needs replacing.

Then there are occasions, such as birthdays and Christmas; many families have to live with the disappointment on their children’s faces when they cannot give them what they want.

They struggle on a daily basis to provide children with what they need, but unexpected events and special occasions just bring home the problems they have to deal with. Even some charity shops, frowned upon by many an embarrassed child, are out of some people’s budget as the cost in day-to-day living rises way beyond that of the rise in benefits.

All of this is so demoralising but as a society we can help. The biggest help would be to change people’s perception of those living in poverty, not by pitying those families but by recognising the skills and abilities these families have. We could also help them to realise that they possess these attributes and empower them to help themselves.

As the government responds to public concerns to address certain issues perhaps it is society which needs to be educated in relation to poverty. A few years ago, one parent was expected to stay at home to raise the children: now both are expected to go out to work; in their absence they are to be held to account for the behaviour of their children. We expect children to listen to their parents, but why should they if their parents are not there to listen to them because they are out at work?

Parents should have a choice of whether and when they return to work after they have had a child, rather then be pressured back into work. The government needs to recognise children’s need for parenting, not just childminding, nursery care, or other childcare provision. Parents should have the opportunity to use their childcare vouchers to pay friends or family to care for children whilst at work. These networks have worked well for many generations before us, so why are they denied financial recognition for the contribution their help makes to the economy?

In conclusion, the reality of poverty is very different from that portrayed by the media or the view held by society in general (often formed by the media). ‘Poor parents’ does not equal poor parenting. Families living in poverty do not want pity but nor do they want to be labelled as lazy scroungers or criminals; they want to be able to be a part of society, contribute to society, have their abilities and resilience recognised. And most of all they want to be empowered, not forced to help themselves out of poverty.

Just like racism or sexism exists, so does povertyism. This form of discrimination needs to be recognised. Those in positions of influence in the government, parliament and the media need to use their power to bring about effective and positive changes to ensure that all families get a fair chance to contribute to society and its future.

Amanda Dyer is a member of ATD Fourth World, an anti-poverty organisation. www.atd-uk.org.